Quite a lot of you may have come across the top five regrets of the dying before. These were compiled by Bronnie Ware when she worked with terminally ill people in a hospice:
1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me
2. I wish I didn't work so hard.
3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish I had let myself be happier.
I was on a public speaking conference last weekend and some friends of mine Koos Wolcken and Jennet Burghard talked about what lessons we can learn from them?
They turned the list upside down. It’s a very simple but powerful re-frame so the list now becomes an encouragement. Which one resonates for you?
1. I have the courage to live my Life True to myself
(instead of the life others expected of me)
2. I spend my energy in a good balance with what is truly meaningful for me
(instead of working too hard and spending so much of my life on the treadmill of work existence
3. I have the courage to express my feelings
(instead of suppressing my feelings in order to keep peace with others)
4. I stay in touch with my friends and maintain contact
(instead of becoming so caught up in my own life and that golden friendships slip by over the years)
5. I let myself be happy
(instead of getting stuck in old patterns and habits )
I’m learning that I have to get a lot better at number 4. Staying in touch with friends. And number 2!
Why the photograph of the young girl?
When I run my public speaking courses I work with a lot of adults who are scared to to be seen. Sared to speak up. Apologising for taking their space.
So I love this young girl's energy and the "don’t mess with me pose!” aka as the I have the courage to live my Life True to myself pose.
I took this photo in New York this summer visiting my wife who is working there for awhile . She has a job offer that she couldn't refuse (but not from the Mafia!) and although I miss hugely we are both seeing it as an adventure.
if you want have a look at my other photographs taken in New York and Northern United States have a look at my flickr album here